The Secret in Me... Tears

Episode 3





[A/N] : This color is Hyun Hae
This color is Ji Yong
This color is Young Bae




“What if..........”



“I’m bored.....when can I get out of this place....” – Ji Yong.
“Ji Yong....” – Hyun Hae, as she just arrives with a happy smile on her face.
“.........” – Ji Yong.
“Eii, what is with the gloomy face, Ji Yong?” – Hyun Hae.
“Why are you here?” – Ji Yong.
“I cannot come here?” – Hyun Hae.
“No.....!!” – Ji Yong.
“Aish, why are you so evil?” – Hyun Hae.
“I am always evil....” – Ji Yong.
“You are always....aren’t you?” – Hyun Hae.
“Not to anyone, specifically.” – Ji Yong.
“...........” – Hyun Hae.
“Oiiee, aren’t you suppose to be at college? Why are you here?” – Ji Yong.
“I couldn’t go to college anymore....” – Hyun Hae, forcing to smile.
“Hey....don’t smile if you can’t. Just cry if you feel like.” – Ji Yong. Hyun Hae looks at Ji Yong with confusion.


The more Hyun Hae looks at Ji Yong, the more she wants to cry.
She tries to hold the tears, but at the end, she failed.
When she cries, no one dares to talk, not even Ji Yong.



Why are you always crying?
“I try to be stronger.....but I cannot....
I am not like anyone else. I cannot be strong as what you think...”
You have wasted lots of tears already....to whom are those tears for?
“I cry because I cry. I never cry for anyone else....and my tears aren’t wasted for anyone else.
It was because I have lost lots of tears already, that it is not important anymore.”
If I ask you not to cry anymore, will you do it?
“What if I fail?”



“After all of the waterworks....she is finally become quiet...” – Ji Yong, staring at Hyun Hae who is falling asleep.


Ji Yong slowly moves his hand towards Hyun Hae head wanting to rub her hairs.
When his hand is closer, Hyun Hae moves a little bit making him to take his hand back.


“What am I doing?” – Ji Yong, as he covers half of his face with his hand and sighs so heavily.



“Can I hold back any longer?
Or will I be falling apart?
I cannot stand it anymore.
It is not a great idea since beginning.
I don’t know why until now I thought of this?
I should just go....”



12:00 am... –
At Kim’s place... –


Hyun Hae cannot sleep again where her mind troubles with lots of thing.
She just keeps on staring at the ceiling while laid on the bed.
Slowly her eyes shutting down without her aware.


But she didn’t know something has happen when she is sleeping where Ji Yong come to visit her.
He climbs up the house until he reaches her room as he hop in.


“Hyun Hae.....” – Ji Yong. He walk slowly towards her and he just stare at her. “I just want to say goodbye to you, Hyun Hae. There is nothing better for me to do here when I am only holding your way. I think....it is time to settle everything. If there is a chance, maybe we could meet up again, or maybe this will be the last time. Just....take care of yourself.”


He moves his head closer to Hyun Hae and kisses her.
Slowly tears flowing down her cheeks and he wipe it off with his fingers. “Do not cry. If I’m not there when you are tears off, who would be? So, don’t cry anymore...”

But when she wakes up, he has already left while the window’s wide open as wind blowing in.


“Was it just a dream?” – Hyun Hae, she can feels her eyes are still wet, but again she cries again. “........You left without saying goodbye to me.



“Since that night, I have never seen him again.
I wonder where he has gone too...
I wonder why he is leaving just like that...
But.....why? Why didn’t he tell me?


It has been for a long time I haven’t seen him.
I went through my days without him trailing me.
Is that good....or bad?
Since he has gone, I have applied myself to this university in Japan.
I hope my life can continue there as much more than here.
There is nothing left for me to be here anymore, so what’s the use of me to stay here in Korea.
Beside, Young Bae will be going to go with me.
I don’t mind of him going, but sooner or later, he shouldn’t be around me anymore.


Live long....without me.”



Year has passed where Hyun Hae is living great in Japan.
She looks so happy being there.
Everyday after class at the university she went, Young Bae will be there as they are meeting with each others.


“Bae....” – Hyun Hae.
“Oh my, I’m sorry if I come late...” – Young Bae.
“Where have you been, Bae? Lately these days, you are always late. Mind to tell me?” – Hyun Hae, smiling.
“It is just something that has come up, no need to worry.” – Young Bae.
“Are you sure? You looks so tired, Bae.” – Hyun Hae.
“..........” – Young Bae, who keep quiet for minutes long. “......I’m hungry; let’s go get something to eat.”
“Ahh....are you avoiding it, Young Bae? Because, I know you are...” – Hyun Hae.
“Aish....not now, Hyun Hae. I’m hungry....please?” – Young Bae.


Young Bae drags Hyun Hae to the café that he just knows today.
When they have arrives there, lots of customers has comes to have their meal there and it is hard for Young Bae to find an empty seat.


“Bae-ahh, let’s just go. It’s packed here; there is no use for us to be here waiting if there is no empty seat for us.” – Hyun Hae.
“Ahh, don’t worry, Hyun Hae...it will be manage by me.” – Young Bae, busy looking around until one of the worker there saw him. She immediately approaches him.
“Young Bae....you come, finally.” – ???, hugging Young Bae.
“Hyun Hae...meets my best friend, Sakuya. We used to goes to the same college before. But yes, for her business brain, she managed to graduate earlier than me.” – Young Bae, teasing his friend; Sakuya. “And yes, she is the owner of the café.”
“Aishh, don’t say like that, Young Bae.” – Sakuya, pinching Young Bae arm.


“You two look so close with each others....” – Hyun Hae, smiling. “.....I envy that.”
“........Well, how about I take you two to your seat now?” – Sakuya.


After arrives at their seat, Sakuya directly take their order.


“You two just take your time, I’ll be right back. And oh, if you two are ready with the menu, just call, alright?” – Sakuya.
“Hmm....what do you want to order, Hyun Hae?” – Young Bae.
“Anything, you recommend one for me, Bae...” – Hyun Hae.
“Well then, anything is okay?” – Young Bae. Hyun Hae just nodded.



Meanwhile... –


“Hey...where are you now?” – Min Jung, on the phone.
“What is the matter with you?” – Ji Yong.
“Aishh, because you are my lover, that’s why...!!” – Min Jung.
“Ohh.....” – Ji Yong.
“Is there anything wrong?” – Min Jung.
“Tell me again, why was it that we’re agreeing to be in this situation?!!” – Ji Yong.
“Because.....you still love me, isn’t it?!!” – Min Jung.
“.............I don’t to talk with you about this, again...understand?!!” – Ji Yong, directly hanging up on the phone.
“Ahh....Yongie....” – Min Jung. “Darn, he ended the call...”


“Such troublesome person!! How dare she mention that...” – Ji Yong, grumpy tone as he enters his apartment.


Just as he is about to enter the living room, he stop moving when he all of sudden remembers Hyun Hae.
Suddenly he starts to feel dizzy where everything starts to get spinning.
Then it happens when he falls unconscious to the floor.



“What happen to me?
Why am I feeling so cold?
I cannot move my body...
I feel so dizzy...
What happen....?
I couldn’t remember anything.”



“!!!!!!!
I can feel it...
Why is it like it is so near?
But when I know it is always far.


I....feel something has wrong.
Am I the only one feeling like this?
I.....I must find the answer.”



“Ahh...I’m sorry, Bae. I must go now.” – Hyun Hae, standing up immediately.
“Hey, where are you going?” – Young Bae, confuse.
“Somewhere....I need to be somewhere.” – Hyun Hae, look so worried.
“.........Just, can you tell me where you wanted to go, Hyun Hae....” – Young Bae. “Then....I can take you there.”
“Please, Young Bae....please, just....” – Hyun Hae, didn’t finish her sentence and just run off like that.
“Ahh, Hyun Hae...!!” – Young Bae, just about to run off catching up Hyun Hae, Sakuya come stopping him up.
“Where are you going? Why are you leaving so early?” – Sakuya, grabbing Young Bae arm and hold it tight.
“Forget about me...I need to go now...” – Young Bae, pulling his arm away from her and starts to run off chasing after Hyun Hae.


On his way running chasing after Hyun Hae, he thought he will lose her but he was wrong when Hyun Hae slow down.


“Hyun Hae....what is wrong?!!” – Young Bae.
“...........” – Hyun Hae, seems to absentminded where she ignores Young Bae’s.
“Are you alright? Tell me, you make me worried, Hyun Hae.” – Young Bae. Suddenly his cell phone ringing and when he looks at the register number, it is Min Yun calling. “Hei...is anything wrong? Why do you call?!!”
“Young Bae-ahh, Young Bae-ahh....you got to the hospital, quick!!” – Min Jung.
“You sound so....panic, what is wrong?!!” – Young Bae.
“It’s Ji Yong....please, quick, Young Bae....please....” – Min Jung.
“What?!! What is wrong with him?!!” – Young Bae.
“You need to get here, quick...” – Min Jung.
“Alright, I’ll be there soon.” – Young Bae, ended the call. Directly he grabs Hyun Hae hand and pulls her as he starts to run to the nearest cab.



At the hospital... –

Hyun Hae and Young Bae are heading to the Japan international hospital and by the time they have arrives, Ji Yong’s has been transmitted to his own room.
Young Bae want to enter the room but only by one person is allow, for now.


“Min Jung, you go ahead....” – Young Bae.
“..........” – Min Jung, quiet for seconds long then she shake her head. “No....I think Hyun Hae should be the one. Go ahead, Hyun Hae. I think Yongie want to see you more than me.”
“!!!!!!!!” – Hyun Hae, shocks. “No....I....”
“Please.....he needed you more than me.” – Min Jung.
“...........” – Young Bae.


Hyun Hae didn’t waste anymore time as she is stepping into the room.
Slowly she walks towards Ji Yong and he is lying on the bed unconscious.


“Ji Yongie.....” – Hyun Hae, tears off when she see Ji Yong lain on the bed. Tears flow down her cheeks as it drops on his hand.



“It has been a long time I haven’t cry.
Not until now...when I started to cry again.
Why is he the one that always make me crying?”



Three days later... –

Hyun Hae goes to the hospital to visit Ji Yong.
When she arrives there, inside the room, Min Jung is feeding him his meal.
Min Jung look so unhappy yet she force to be happy and smiles.
When she saw Hyun Hae coming, she put the food away and excuses herself.


“Thanks for coming....but he doesn’t want to eat anything. Please....he really needs his nutritious more....” – Min Jung. Hyun Hae just nodded and moves forwards.
“Hey....Ji Yong...” – Min Jung, smiling. Ji Yong didn’t greet her back as he just kept on staring to the outside view. “Ji Yong....please eats some...?”


But it is just useless even when Hyun Hae try to feed him.
He didn’t move at all, he is just like a living doll.
Hyun Hae didn’t give up but she tries many times so that he eats even a little bit.


“Ji Yong....Why?” – Hyun Hae.
“............” – Ji Yong.
“Don’t you........want to look at me? Ji Yong....I missed when you were so evil to me...but now, you are....” – Hyun Hae, didn’t finish her sentence when tears starts to flows down her cheeks. She quickly wipes her tears away and trying again to feed him with the food.


Outside the room, Young Bae is leaning his body to the wall as he spying and eying the whole thing.
He looks so angry just seeing someone he loves so much treated so badly.
Slowly she takes out a little box from his jacket pocket.
He just stares at the box and didn’t do anything.


“Stupid!! How can I be so much stupid?!! I shouldn’t have made a move so fast that in the end it will just crushed everything. Everything was a mistake especially this stupid ring...!! I should have known this from the first.” – Young Bae, cursing himself.
“Young Bae....” – Min Jung, standing not far from where he is at.
“Ahh, Min Jung...” – Young Bae, quickly putting back the box into his pocket.
“Are you alright?!! Ahh...I know it is not my business, but.....Young Bae......” – Min Jung.
“No...It’s alright. Beside, I’m already too late.” – Young Bae.
“I’m sorry....” – Min Jung.



It has been a week long already since Ji Yong’s at the hospital.
And all those times also, there is no changes and every time Hyun Hae come to visit him, every time he didn’t responded at her, tears flowing down her cheeks.
But for her, she never gives up even she lost many tears already.
Until one day when she come to visit him.


“Ji Yong....” – Hyun Hae, entering the room. “Guess who is with me....? Its Young Bae...”
“...........” – Ji Yong, no respond from him, just a stare.
“Are you sure, Hyun Hae...?” – Young Bae.
“Ahh, no, it’s okay, Ji Yong wouldn’t mind, right?” – Hyun Hae, smiling so happy at Ji Yong and expected an answer from him but it is just hopeless.
“Hmm....I’ll go buy some bread from the bakery, so I’ll be right back.” – Young Bae.
“Ahh, Young Bae...” – Hyun Hae, running towards Young Bae.
“What is wrong, Hyun Hae...?” – Young Bae.
“........” – Hyun Hae, pulling down gently Young Bae jacket. “Please....be careful...”
“.............” – Young Bae, gloomy as his expression changes. “Why....do you make me so weak?!! Why? You’re the one that only can make me like this....please; I might fall apart if I cannot hold this back.”


After Young Bae has left, Hyun Hae walk towards Ji Yong and sits next to him.
She gives him a smile yet he just stares at the same direction everyday; the outside view.


“Ji Yong.....” – Hyun Hae.
“...........” – Ji Yong.
“Please.....Ji Yong.” – Hyun Hae.


Then suddenly, the doctor who treated Ji Yong comes to the room.
He greeted them but Ji Yong didn’t respond at all.
He bow at Hyun Hae and she bow at him back.


“Ji Yong....how are you today?” – Doctor.
“.........” – Ji Yong, his expression changes, somehow he looks so upset when the doctor came.
“Ahh....I see....” – Doctor.
“Doctor....can you please....tell me, what is wrong with Ji Yong?” – Hyun Hae.
“Ahh....he hasn’t....told you yet, is he...?” – Doctor. Hyun Hae shakes his head. “.........He has lost his voice, permanent. Now, he cannot talk anymore. He can make sounds or anything. But other than that, everything is alright.”
“!!!!!!!!” – Ji Yong. He starts to throw away everything on the desk as it flying to the floor.
“Ji Yong...!!” – Hyun Hae.


Quickly the doctor order the nurse to gives Ji Yong a shot so that he can be calm.
From havoc, slowly it calm down.
After awhile, it has stop and Ji Yong stop being ballistic.
He becomes like that when he cannot accept the news that he has lost his voice.
Now, he cannot talk or anything, and that has makes his brain become disorder.


“..........” – Hyun Hae, shocks from the new she just got from the doctor. She is just standing there. But slowly she walks towards Ji Yong. “Ji Yong.....”
“!!!!!!” – Ji Yong, look up at Hyun Hae and immediately hugs her tight as tears come out from his eyes.
“...........” – Hyun Hae, calming Ji Yong down. “Please, don’t worry, Ji Yong. I will be here....always.”


Hyun Hae tries to smiles, yet she cannot hide her tears.
It flows down her cheeks.
Ji Yong wipes her tears with his hand and touches her cheeks after.



“If I may....
Please always be here for me....”
Do not cry anymore....
“How can I not cry....It was because of you I cry...”
I’m sorry.
“Why?”
Because I have made you cry.....


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